THE LOWDOWN

Hoar Cross Hall and its spa terrace from the air

Part elegant Elizabethan manor, part Miami spa, Hoar Cross Hall is a grown-up escape with serious spa credentials. Nestled in the Staffordshire countryside 11 miles from Lichfield, this grade II-listed beauty is home to one of the largest state-of-the-art spas in Europe. And the show-stopping £3million outdoor spa terrace (opened in 2024) has catapulted it into the top tier of English spas.

THE VIBE

Properly grand, but in no way intimidating. Whether you’re slouching in a spa robe or clicking in Louboutins, the staff are relaxed and helpful. The hotel and spa are split into two interconnected parts: the old hall houses the hotel while the spa is in a newer, modern wing.

Enter through the main hotel reception and you’ll be greeted by two mighty carved wooden stags, swanky lighting and a welcome drink. Off to the left is the dramatic 114ft Long Gallery bar and lounge, lined with dark wood panelling and fabulous George Frederick Bodley plasterwork ceiling.

The Long Gallery is the main artery through the hotel side of Hoar Cross Hall and leads to the grand Ballroom restaurant, luxurious library and gorgeous garden suites. On the other side, a long corridor connects the hotel with the spa. Louche artworks of literary greats like Daphne du Maurier, Sylvia Plath, and Mark Twain, adorn the white wood-panelled walls. It gives the place a fresh, youthful feel and acts as a natural intro to the more modern spa.

THE SPA

sun loungers on spa terrace at hoar cross hall

Let’s start with the stand-out space (and newest addition): the outdoor Spa Terrace. Peppered with firepits, luxe lounging beds, private cabanas, and three come-hither spa pools – it’s beautiful to look at and insanely Instagrammable. It’s difficult to drag yourself out of the bubbling spa pools, which work whether it’s summer or winter, day time or dusk. With waiters delivering your drinks direct to the water, you won’t need to either.

the pool outside spa terrace hoar cross hall

There’s a Juniper Log sauna where you can enjoy a multi-sensory Aufguss ritual (basically where you get wafted with scent, music and towel-choreography) and an icy barrel plunge for the brave.

Inside, there are oodles of options. My favourites are in the Sanctum, a haven of calm where you’ll find dreamy, low-lit lounging beds, cocooning hanging pods, and a wonderfully-warm pool. Here you can grab a very cool flotation mat, lay back and bob about. Ridiculously relaxing.

What else? Switch from balmy saunas to freezing showers in the Nordic heat and ice area, head to the detox centre for saunas, steam room, and hilarious, shriek-inducing experience showers. Then there’s the classic saltwater pool, complete with roomy hot tubs and secluded starlit cave.

THE TREATMENTS

Full disclosure. I’m pretty fussy when it comes to massages. I’ve reviewed more than my fair share of treatments and recognise an experienced therapist when I find one. And this one? Wow. She’s good. After easing me into the hour-long Elemis Expert Absolute Face and Body Ritual with a warm, gentle foot rub, she gets stuck in to the hard graft of my back and shoulders. Being a Muddy ed has its merits, but perfecting posture ain’t one of them. The therapist finds knots I didn’t know I had and some of the treatment veers more towards pain than pleasure. It’s almost a relief once I flip over for my facial. The products are a delight and feel dreamy on the skin and I start to zen out and really relax. But it’s once the treatment has ended that I really feel the benefit. I feel like I’m attached to a helium balloon, my shoulders feel incredible, although I’m fully zonked, like I’ve run a marathon. The therapists here are a class act – do not skimp on a treatment.

PILLOW TALK

Bedrooms feel fresh and modern, while still paying homage to the historic building. So you’ve got muted blue walls, with pops of orange on cushions and velvet chairs alongside contemporary chandeliers and gilt-framed mirrors. It all feels welcoming, bright, but elegant.

Beds are dreamy and there’s an entire menu of pillows to pick from so you get your slumber just right. A Nespresso machine and Dyson hairdryer give an extra nod to luxury. But it’s the views, from the south side anyway, that elevate the bedrooms from wonderful to wow. I’m in a garden view room and beyond the pretty, formal gardens, vast vistas of buttercup fields stretch out for miles.

SCOFF & QUAFF

If you’re staying overnight, all your meals are served in the deliciously decadent ballroom. Grade II-listed William Morris wallpaper on the walls, chandeliers dripping from a tastefully ornate ceiling, wooden parquet flooring, and sunlight flooding through the huge windows. When you slouch in dressed in robe and sliders in a post-massage funk for lunch, it’s a bit of a wake-up call – albeit a heady, sybaritic one. The epicurean experience just gets better when you realise this is no light spa snack – you’ll be enjoying three courses for lunch and another three course feast for dinner (plus a no-limits breakfast buffet the next day). Thank god for the forgiving robe.

I kick off the scoff-fest with a citrus-cured salmon and avo purée that’s zingy and gorgeous. Next, it’s a superfood salad for me that helps me feel a little more virtuous and chicken breast with root veg for my daughter (who has come along for the ride as a mid A-level treat). Both good, if not massively memorable. We didn’t have much room for dessert, but were glad we snaffled a lemon curd cheesecake with raspberries – elegant and excellent.

When we return for dinner later that evening, the ballroom feels quite different with low-lighting, sommeliers setting up silver wine buckets, and guests dressed up (or at least robe-free). And the menu definitely steps it up a notch. The cocktails are literally irresistible, with the menu sparking prolonged um-ing and ah-ing. In the end the Spring Nightingale wins it; a mix of bergamot, elderflower, champagne, and orange granita. It’s the right choice – boozy, orangey, delicate.

We start with Hogget Croquette with parsnip purée, mint and apple and smoked salmon tartare with pickled shallot. Both delicious and bursting with punchy flavour and tasty contrasting textures. For main course, the slow-cooked blade of beef dazzles us both. Soft, falling apart beef that’s big on flavour and comes with a very moreish gravy. Dinner here definitely feels like a treat, with the food more than matching up to the elegant surrounds.

The only way to approach breakfast the following morning is with a hard blast, early morning Tabata class to work up some sort of appetite. The class is brilliant fun and just the kind of short, sharp session I love. Still stuffed though, so it’s fruit, granola and yoghurt for me, but the cooked breakfast buffet selection looks fabulous if you’re up for more.

OUT & ABOUT

Go out? Who are you kidding! Although, there is plenty to do in the grounds if you’re itching to get active outside: tennis, archery, a driving range, even axe-throwing. If you’re mad enough to want to leave the deliciousness of the spa hotel, or you’re book-ending your visit with some exploring, there are lots of lovely things to do nearby – from the National Memorial Arboretum to the arty indie Red Carpet Cinema at Barton Marina.

KID-FRIENDLY?

Nope. Hoar Cross Hall is (thankfully) adults hotel, designed for those over 16.

ACCESSIBILITY

Excellent, with a couple of designated accessible bedrooms providing 24-hour pull cord assistance and assisted bathrooms, plus a further five ground floor bedrooms suitable for limited access. Access to the spa is good and there’s a hoist for the Saltwater Pool, along with disabled shower and toilet facilities.

MUDDY VERDICT

GOOD FOR: A well-earned treat. Couples love Hoar Cross Hall, groups of friends, special birthday celebrations, but it’s equally enjoyable solo and you won’t feel out of place if you visit alone.

NOT FOR: Families with children. Leave the kids (and the dog) at home – this one is very much a grown up treat.

THE DAMAGE: A Serenity Stay in a Garden Room costs from £300 per person per night (includes a full spa day, 60 minute treatment and three à la carte meals). Too much? Book a Sunset Spa Session from 7pm-10pm with light meal and live music on the spa terrace.

Hoar Cross Hall, Maker Ln, Burton upon Trent, Burton-on-Trent DE13 8QS

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